Now

Its been a year. A year since I moved here. A year since I took a step of faith. It was so scary. I tried to fill the empty, lonely and scared places but every time it led me to death. I saw my hope for the future dying. I saw myself self centered, useless, instant gratifying, numb my feelings. 

This whole year I have wrestled hard. Wrestled with my thoughts, my doubts, my salvation. For the first time I am trying to figure out what it looks like to follow Him. To be the Image of Him. 

I experienced the most real spiritual battle. The moment my affections are on Christ, is the same moment the battle rages for my time, my affections and the reign of my heart. 

I sought hard because I was at the complete end of myself. I was alone and I had to feel it. However, that time of solitude has been a living spring for me. My heart thirsts for His life giving waters. And He has filled me overflowing.

My world is not blowing in the wind of peoples opinions or approval. My foundations is set. I can not be moved. 

How could I doubt that He can be trusted? He performed miracles for me and I am still But every time it leads to sin. Every time it leads to death. 

He has been very persistent in what he is asking from me. 

He is asking me to trust Him with obedience. I dont need other things to satisfy. My obedience leads to life. Fullfillment. Rest in who I am. I’m safe. I’m complete. I’m enough. You are in the shelter of the shadow of His wings. He goes before and behind. He is faithful. 

He gave me dominion over my territory. That means I protect, care for and fight against all darkness.

A very real practical way I fight is my excercising, if I dont excercise I want to numb,

Psalm 27:13-14 reveals his breakthrough strategy, I would have despaired unless I believed I would see the goodness of the Lord. Wait; be strong, and let your heart take courage. Notice David’s words, “I would have despaired?” But he didn’t. Instead, he cast his confidence onto the Lord and believed in God’s character when he couldn’t trace His hands

“For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery.”

‭‭Galatians‬ ‭5:1‬ ‭ESV‬‬

https://www.bible.com/59/gal.5.1.esv